Spiritual Lessons
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Everything Changes So Quickly
Just a few days ago I was facing houselessness. I was considering moving into my truck camper full-time, and then I woke up one bright sunny morning and everything had changed.
I had grown used to the feeling of dread I had waking up every morning and knowing I was at the end of my ten year journey with my house. I was grieving and letting go. I feared never having a home again; being a vagabond for the rest of my life. Although in part, it appealed to me to be so footloose and fancy free, the Taurus in me was really rebelling. There was a fight between the part of me that wanted to roam, and the part of me that needed roots. And it was that one bright, sunny morning in my home in Arizona that the two parts of me came to a compromise.
My truck camper had served me well for three years. I loved it! It had been my home, away from home. But it was time to let it go. Instead of letting my house go, I would let my house on wheels go and I would go back to Red Raven, my mini van, for my adventures, at least for now. I would have both roots and wings.There was an excitement about rebuilding Red Raven as my camper. She was so much sleeker, lighter and so much better on gas. She wasn’t the tiny home that my camper was. She didn’t have a kitchen and a bathroom, a queen bed, and a dinette. But she would have a bed and a makeshift kitchen.
Rather than driving off into the abyss, not knowing where I was going or where I would end up, which I have to admit, is a bit exciting, I would be renting out the upstairs of my home and moving into my downstairs space. This would allow me to still have a home base and be able to journey in the van.My Eat, Pray, Roam journey would continue as I capture the journey of eating a plant based diet, being on a spiritual path, and roaming to interesting places.
Having roots and wings really appeals to me. This is the best of both worlds I have the stability of my home and the freedom of roaming in Red Raven.
Let the journey begin!
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Facing Houselessness
I have been waking up early in the morning with a feeling of dread. It is that familiar feeling that I am not being supported by the Universe; that life is kicking me out. I get up! Make my tea and sit with the feeling until it gives way to other feelings. I log into my computer to write this blog post and see that a past client is reaching out for support. A small sign of abundance. I turn my phone on and my boyfriend is offering to buy my van, Red Raven, now, so that I will have the cash, and I will turn it over to him when I leave. More abundance.
Maybe the Universe is showing me that I am making the right decision. It is supporting me in my new direction. Maybe as I surrender and move in the direction that is unfolding before me, more opportunity and more abundance will come.
My saving grace is to trust in the very thing I feel has abandoned me and let me down. I have to trust that this higher power; this higher force has a plan for my life that I can’t yet understand. This is a redirection. I am being guided into a new life. I don’t know what that life looks like. Sometimes I fear the worst.
My reflections go to the homeless man sitting on the street corner with his sign “anything will help,” and I see him through new eyes. What was his story? How did he get there? Any one passing by might assume it was drugs, or alcohol or some catalyst of his own doing. But what if it was just a series of events so far beyond his control, that he could not break the fall?
In Sedona, it is typical to hear the saying “why did you create this?” With the law of attraction, there is an assumption that everything we experience in our life is a product of our own creation, either consciously or subconsciously. Either we are creating through intention or through default. But this has always been confusing for me. For months on end I would wake up every morning thanking God for my great abundance, even as my life was falling apart. I would still affirm that I was wealthy and had everything I needed. This didn’t prevent my life from falling apart. Some might say I didn’t feel it enough. I didn’t believe it strong enough. But the truth is, I did believe that things were going to turn around for me. I put so much effort into trying to keep my life afloat, believing that my efforts were going to pay off.
This is where the feeling of betrayal comes from. I did everything right! Sure I felt fear and uncertainty. But I also had a lot of hope and faith that things were going to change. So is it possible that life takes everything from us, when it is trying to redirect us? Does the Universe/God, rip our life apart when we are far too comfortable, so we will be forced into the life that is more fully aligned with our purpose?
A friend of mine reminded me “Kaleah, maybe one day you will look back on this time and realize you were taken to a much greater place.” The new can always be much greater than the old. But it can also be worse. Only time will tell.
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Nomadic Life is Calling
In the past I have had many different adventures. I was flying solo in my Red Mini Van, and traded the van in for a truck and camper where I had three more summers flying solo.It was amazing to have both roots and wings. I had my home in Arizona which gave me roots, and anchor to keep me from flying too fast or too far. I always had some place to come back home to. But then there was a change in circumstances. The business that had supported me for twenty years dried up. I was being kicked out of the life I had created.
Although it initially felt the Universe was no longer supporting me and God had betrayed me, I needed to go deeper and see this sudden shift in energy as a redirection. It was time for me to let go of my home, my roots, my anchor. It was time for me to embrace nomadic living full-time. To fully immerse myself in this lifestyle and share it with others. Perhaps I could be a source of inspiration for those who choose not to live the ordinary life in the ordinary way.
To mark this new journey, I have decided to change the name of my Website to the same name as my new Youtube Channel; Eat, Pray, Roam. I have chosen this name because so many people can relate to a woman’s quest to find herself, out there, in the world; to nuture herself through good food and embrace the spiritual path via nomadic living.
My new venture will feature not only nomadic life, but my plant based diet, health, wellness and spirituality. We will eat, we will pray, and we will roam together.
We will also delve into the current, chaotic state of the world and the rising cost of living, looking at alternative ways of being in the world. We have seen such an influx of van lifers, rv’ers and people living in tiny homes, homesteading, and stepping away from traditional living.
Perhaps it is a sign of the times. So many people are realizing that life is not about working for someone who sucks every ounce of life from their soul. Life is to be lived. It is our birthright. And if we are to be authentic and follow our inner guidance, we can’t put ourselves into situations that don’t support who we are becoming. We need to make choices that feed our soul.
And this is why I am making the choice to leave the life and the home I have loved. I can no longer support this life. It no longer supports me. It has served me well. I am grateful! And now I must follow inspiration to the next phase of my journey through life.
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My Bike was Taken!
September 22nd! It is the Fall Equinox, the end of summer, and my son’s 30th Birthday! I was preparing to head home and close out my nearly four month journey in my Truck Camper, with my electric bike as the tow vehicle.
What I feel I gained the most on this journey was resilience. I learned to take things as they come and not create a big drama about anything; even if those things felt big at the time.
I had a blow out, bad rim, another flat, my bike fell off the rack several times, things broke and needed fixed, the truck was in the shop twice, for minor things, and still here I was, loving the journey! Because I was going to let those things that happened, make me stronger, more solid and not rob me of my joy!
On my last bike ride, it was a lonely country road in the high desert of Idaho, riding along the snake river. I was in bliss and ironically there was a road sign that said ‘Bliss 14 miles.” I knew I wouldn’t get that far, so may as well be in bliss now! I road about 12 miles out of the small town of Glenns Ferry, where my truck and camper was parked at the Y Knot Vineyards. I got a flat tire. My first in over a thousand miles of riding.
I pulled out my handy, dandy bike pump and patch kit and went to town, only nothing was happening. I didn’t have the right adapter for the bike pump and I was stuck out here 12 miles from town. I wasn’t sure what to do. I felt stressed. There were no taxi’s or ubers around here. I didn’t want to drag a heavy bike with a flat tire along a twelve mile journey. If I got a ride, the bike would be an issue. So I decided to leave the bike behind and come back to get it.
I put the bike in a ditch. Assessing the traffic along that country road, there wasn’t much and the traffic I did see they were all speeding along, they wouldn’t notice my bike in the ditch. So I took the heavy battery, stuffed it in my backpack and started walking. I was fully prepared to walk the whole twelve miles if I had to, but I hoped I would manifest a ride, and soon.
I walked about a mile and a half and a little truck stopped right ahead on the highway. Having already put my life in God’s hands, I said thank you and went up to the window. It was a young man with his pack of cigarettes who looked like he was just off the farm. And he was. He told me he was coming from his ranch just up the road and was going to Glenns Ferry. I said thank you and jumped in.
The rancher talked about the ranch and his three son’s and how his Father wanted two promises of him before he died. One was that he could die at home with his family around him. The other was that he would keep the farm going and pass it down to the next generation. I asked him if his son’s wanted to farm and he said yes, they are all excited about inheriting the farm. When we got into town I told him I was staying out at the Y Knot Vineyards and he said “Y Knot” it is” and he drove me right up to my truck. I thanked him beyond words for his kindness and generosity and he seemed pleased he could help.
I prepared my truck camper for travel, unplugged it and drove out to get my bike. I was so grateful I didn’t have to walk. I knew exactly where I had left my bike and even took a picture of the cross streets. But when I came up on where I had put my bike, it was gone.
At first I was in denial. No! Nobody would take my bike? Who would do that? Once again, I found my self standing in that exact same spot where I got the flat, only my heart sunk ten times deeper, because it felt like all hope of seeing my bike again had just left me.
I called 911, because I didn’t know what else to do. I told them I was standing out here in the middle of nowhere and needed to report a stolen bike. They found out where I was and said the Sheriff was on another call but would be out after. So I sat in my truck and decided while waiting for the deputy Sheriff I would call my son, who is also a deputy, and wish him a happy birthday. I got his voicemail and wished him a happy birthday and told him a bit of the story of where I was at. He called back within minutes and we talked up until the Sheriff came.
I gave a report and he asked me to send him photos of the bike and the serial number. So as I was getting images from my phone to send him, the Rancher came back up in his truck, on his way home from town. I told him my bike was stolen and the Sheriff had just been here and he expressed genuine concern.
We talked a bit about what had happened and then a man on a motorcycle, that looked more like a dune buggy, rode up and asked me what part of Arizona I was from. I told him Cottonwood, and he said he was also from Arizona, staying with a friend here in Idaho until the end of October. My bike was stolen party was just beginning. I now had a sheriff, a rancher and a biker wanting to help me find my bike.
The rancher made a few calls and posted on facebook. He also offered to store the bike for me if it is recovered after I leave. The biker offered to bring the bike to me in Arizona if it was recovered by the end of October. I felt taken care of.
I went back home and posted on craigslist lost and found. I didn’t know where else to post. I put photos up and within 24 hours I got a call from a man telling me he thinks he might have my bike. He bought it from a young guy with a truck with a “Boise State” sticker on it. He only paid 125.00 for it and talked the seller down from 250.00. I was thinking, “I will give you 125.00 for that bike right now!” and went on to tell him there was a police report filed on the bike and the serial number was given. He seemed a little odd after that. I got my hopes up but the Police said it was probably a scam and I realized he was right.
Turned out he was just passing through and is now in Tennessee but he could ship the bike. When he told me he called the shipping company and they could ship it for $110, I’m thinking “that’s cheap!” So I said great, could you please give me the name and number of the shipping company and I will call them and see if I can pay them directly. He told me I couldn’t, I had to pay him. He started to get agitated with me and told me he was trying to help me out but I was putting him in a real bind because the bike is stolen property. I asked him calmly, if he could please explain to me how asking to speak to the shipping company to see if I can pay them directly was putting him in a bind, and well, the rest is history.
I spent my last two nights at the County Park RV park in Twin Falls, which was very beautiful. The weather was perfect. There was a walking trail and so I started walking again. I hadn’t been walking much because I was always on the bike.
My time in Twin Falls helped me to process the bike ripped away from me so quickly at the end of my journey, on the first day of Fall. I was in the place I was to take my last big bike journey, on a bike and walking trail that went along the Snake river canyon. But that journey would have to be another time.
I went down the metaphysical road looking for any possible understanding of what losing my bike meant. What was I suppose to learn from this. And the thought came to me “maybe its just something that happens to people and today it happened to you.!”
But I also saw the kindness and generosity in people. I had a new connection with my son that comes with both of us growing up, and I have a heart full of beautiful experiences from the journey I had just taken.
My neighbors at the Twin Falls County Park both had electric bikes and I told them about my experience. They told me they had a buddy system where they both would always have each others back. I said that was beautiful but I was flying solo!
My friend Bern said “Oh Kaleah that bike was your wings!” And yes she was right. My bike, and my truck camper, were both my wings and the journey transformed me! It helped me to realize I could deal with anything life brings. I may not like it! But I dealt with each hard lesson life brought me with courage and strength. I stayed present and just did what I needed to do.
Yes, I could do things better, in hind sight. But maybe as I put a little distance on it, I wouldn’t change a thing, because each experience, the good, the bad and the ugly were all part of the journey to show me my own resilience.
And so I go home, about 72 pounds lighter. But I have decided to buy another bike exactly like the one I had. Meet me in the next chapter!
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Settling In
When traveling in an RV the main idea is that we go to all these places and do all these things that we feel inspired to do. But after three months of traveling, I am spending the last month just staying in one place, well mostly!
After my San Juan Island biking adventure I went to visit family for nearly two weeks and then back to the RV park near Bellingham that I loved so much. However I stopped off at friends house for a couple days first and they invited me to park on their property rather than the RV park. I decided to go back to the RV park for my work week and do another couple biking ventures in the Whatcom County countryside before settling in with friends who are walking distance to the beach. I’ve spent so much time alone on this journey and have really enjoyed the solitude but felt it would be nice to share the journey for a while.
So rather than being “on the road” I will continue to enjoy Whatcom County and all it has to offer. I consider this area to be my second home in so many ways and there is so much beauty and awe here.
When people ask me “where do you live,” I tell them that my main home is in Arizona and my second home is a camper. That has been so true and I love having my second home. No matter where I am, I am home!
What I am loving now is that it is harvest time for so many beautiful fruits and veggies. The farmers markets are loaded with colorful baskets of strawberries, blueberries, raspberries, huge heads of kale and romaine as well as many other veggies. For all who know me, I am a foodie, for sure. My fridge is always stocked and I always cook at home.
One of my RV neighbors was telling me that there wasn’t much in the way of good food out here in the County where we are parked and I couldn’t really relate because Safeway had enough organics to keep me going in between my stops at the Coop and farmers market. When I was at the Farmers Market with my friends we decided to eat at one of the booths that offered Indian food. As I sat with my big plate of Vegetable Curry, I said “you know this is the first time I have eaten out all summer.”
We are nearing the end of August and Fall will soon be arriving here in the Northwest. I notice the temperatures are starting to fall and the nights are colder. But the days are still warm and beautiful. There has been some drizzly days that encourage staying indoors, curled up with a journal or a book, and a nice cup of tea, and then there are those bright, warm days that send me outdoors to the beach or on a bike ride. The blackberries are in bloom and the scent always draws me in. I have yet to pick berries for later. I just pick and eat.
As I settle in, enjoying the end of summer in the Pacific Northwest, I am grateful for the abundance, for the bounty of all that is offered. With all the crazy going on in the world right now, I retreat to the simple life and learn to live in gratitude for what is good and beautiful! I have no control of the insanity “out there” in the world, but I do have control over my own inner life and know that being here, now is the only way to truly live. I will let the past fall away and the future unfold as it will! For now, I am going on a bike ride….
